Poor Shrinking Brain

Mentally exhausted, she discovered today her poor 31-year-old brain, which has always served her quite proud in the past, is no spring chicken. It was one of those "mirror gazing" days, one where one pulls, pokes and thoroughly investigates themselves to discover just how far they have let themselves slide. An over-done scene in movies, it's the one right before the hero or heroine fervently wish they were their younger self-or someone else, only to fall asleep to find upon waking that not only was there some fantastical storm, but also that their wish came true. Of course we all know the storyline after that, narrated with an over abundance and not really funny slap-stick humor and mediocre acting, the star of the show quickly learns their needed life-changing lesson and tries desperately to revert back to their plain and old self with their new-found morals and happy-to-be-me feelings in tote.

In her situation; however, there was no wrinkle counting, flab jiggling, or cellulite hating, just a strong realization during her first language lesson that her brain hurt. As if she sprained or overextended it. It wasn't ready for the mental calisthenics she decided to just throw it into. Poor shriveling brain, it didn't even know what was coming. During those 2 measly hours, it became an overstuffed backpack with an owner insistent on cramming 5 more items that physically the laws could not allow fit. Excess information bulging, tearing at the seams of her ears and pressuring her eyes, she's certain an inevitable tear is slowly letting loose each new piece of "parler francais" information that she paid to learn, like a tiny hole in a bean bag chair-only you don't realize that there is a hole until you sit in it and plunk flat on the ground with bean-bag stuffing shooting haphazardly away from you in all directions.

A new compassion for ADHD sufferers becomes her-she understands now. She's sure she nodded at the right times, maybe even repeated the appropriate things back, but the whole experience is nothing but a haze. She has notes with no remembrances of how they got there. She does recall a few occasions towards the end of her one-on-one tutor-age where she caught herself just staring blankly at the guy, realizing that an answer was due and she was clueless that he was even speaking. Her poor brain would then scramble to figure out what he had just spoken to her-which was to her brain a sprint after an already uphill marathon. It was pure exhaustion.

So she's not sure if today was a success or not. Phil told her that when learning a language you are supposed to to try and forget everything you learn, to relax and when you need it, it will all come back...if that's the case then she's sooo ahead in this game as she doesn't even have to TRY to forget, it's forgotten whether she wants it to be or not!